Thursday, October 25, 2012

And now, here's this stuff

I got the "corrected" divorce paperwork today.  Guess what?  Still not correct.  Including--once again--my name.  Even after notifying YKW's attorney that there were errors, there are still errors.  This is never going to be over...ugggghhhhh...  Again, this just continues to drag on and on and on and on...can it just be over?!?!  I just want this to be over... 

At least I can dress Ward up as a pirate for Halloween to distract myself from the annoyance of having to deal with the stupid divorce.  Isn't he dapper?  

He's quite charming as a pirate, I must say.  Especially because he's so fat that the costume barely fits over him.  Such a fatty-cakes.

And for whatever reason, Hubert seems to have a thing for towels.  I don't get it.  But, whatever, I guess, if it makes him happy, go for it.  Just stick to the dirty towels, not the clean ones.  I don't want to try to dry off with a cat-hair-covered towel.

And next week, I'm up for trial. Weeeee!!!  It's a misdemeanor case, so it should be easier than my recent trials--usually the misdemeanors are much less complicated of cases than the felony cases.  And I'm on a record-breaking pace with my trials.  Next week's trial will be #9 for the year.  I'm a trial machine.

In other work-related news, I have had a couple of funny encounters recently with my prosecutorial counterparts.  Here's the summary of these, so you all can giggle along, too.

Me: Hi, we have [Client's Name] on for a hearing today.  I'm wondering if there's an offer for the file.
Prosecutor (pulls a piece of paper out of his file and studies it for a minute): Hmmm...well, looks like I wrote one out ahead of time.  I must have been on drugs when I wrote this. Here you go.
(The offer was really, really good for my client.)

Message left on my voicemail by one of the prosecutors I get along with really well: (For reference, my office voicemail message asks callers to spell their first and last names and to provide their case number if possible and in Minnesota, court file numbers for criminal cases are ##-CR-##-#####)  
Hello, this is [Prosecutor's Name].  That's spelled [gives spelling].  My case number is (muffled laughter)...ahhh, I can't even do it with a straight face...(giggling) case number is 99-CR-F-U-C-K...(giggling) Y-O-U.  I need you to call me right away to discuss my case because I'm completely innocent and this is totally a set-up.  Thanks.

I'm probably going to have to record that permanently, just so I can listen to it and laugh when I'm having a crappy day.  Sometimes, my job is freaking hilarious.

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